[Friday February 3rd, 2006 at 4:26pm] I've moved. Perhaps, I'll see you on the other side. READ 03 REPLY

[Sunday January 8th, 2006 at 4:48pm] [ mood | mellow ] [ music | the ataris - looking back on today ] Yesterday was spent in the company of this noob. However, as adorable as Emeric, my canadian-born,soon-to-be-francophone cousin is, I miss my boyfriend. For three hours last night my grandmother and I laughed and spoke french. I feel bad for those of you that think its uncool to spend time with your grandparents. It's really a sad thing. You'll never know the fun of laugh-enduced belly aches from calling everyone in the family a new french curse word. READ 04 REPLY

[Saturday December 24th, 2005 at 9:18am] [ music | ben kweller - in other words ] As much as I love christmas, it'll be so much better when it's over. The last couple weeks have been messy. Tiring. Depressing as hell. I miss leisure time. I miss my boyfriend. I miss my friends. Yesterday after a pretty low key but all the same meaningless 8-215 school day, about 1/8 of the poetry club watched about 1/4 of the french film Amelie (thus far, really great). Fractions are key. Afterwards, I had the best afternoon in a while just washing sweaters, wrapping some gifts and then retiring to the living quarters for law and order and some knittng resulting in me falling into a deep sleep within the half hour. I cannot tell you how much I love time to myself to do whatever I please especially at such a crucial time. I had the day off because according to my manager, fourteen hours the week of christmas is "just how the game goes". I take it that I need to prepare for not working at all. &I can tell you right now that finding a job in January is going to be nothing short of impossible. Things I've learned in the last couple weeks. 1. If nothing else, I make excellent cupcakes. 2. According to Jone's Fufu berry soda caps, I "will meet some one that will enhance [my] life dramatically very soon." 3. Lo mein tastes like vinegar after being left out for a week. Joyeux Noel, mon compains. Keep those letters and postcards coming. READ 03 REPLY

[Tuesday November 29th, 2005 at 7:38pm] [ mood | happy ] [ music | of montreal - the party's crashing us ] It's days like these that make me so grateful. I dont think I've ever been in such a good mood. Since everett high cares nothing of little academic affairs called six hour school days, we got out at one for a goddamn football game. No matter though because I've relearned everything I love about my boyfriend. First a great afternoon indoors, followed by nellie furtado and strip padiddle and scallion pankcakes and juice boxes and dunkaroos. I love that two and a half years later it still takes us fifteen minutes plus to say goodbye. It also doesnt hurt that Evan has the finest backside in new england. READ 02 REPLY

[Saturday November 19th, 2005 at 6:50pm] [ mood | LOUSY ] [ music | ben kwelller - i need you back ] I started knitting and crocheting this week. That way I can be a little more pathetic on lonesome friday (&now saturday)nights. A cold is so humbling, sometimes. I asked to be less egotistical and out came this flurry of muscus from the sky to cut me down to size. For one thing, walks to school, fevered, heavy headed and desperately fatigued means I'm caring less about punctuation, overcoats needs not apply. It's like everyday some one else discovers I'm not worth their time. It's sounds so arrogant to say, but I wish I were singular enough to be a soul worth recycling. Circling the decades like a hand me down. Tis the season of barren bracnhes, bloated doormats, refrigorator relatives. I'm wondering if I'm going to spend my life being small eggplant to the deli lady at three dee's. I have dim expectations for pet names. It's a miracle that when harry met sally isn't on. What a keen sense of punctuality that movie has for knowing when I've gone soft. I even segregated my thoughts so you might actually read them. Because I've become all too aware that I'm not a priority. I'm perfectly content with spending my evening with Dorian Gray. READ 05 REPLY

[Saturday November 12th, 2005 at 6:01pm] The last two weeks have been pretty hellish. My camera needs to be sent in for repairs. Taxes ate my pay check like goddamn fried chicken. Let me just say that I am not being paid enough to deal with old hags that cant bear to make anything even remotely tolerable for me. I asked this women to tell the man in back of her that I was closed (whilst in the middle of a huge return and up to my nips in paperwork) and she was like "why cant you do it yourself?" and then proceeded afterwards to drop a frame on my foot. Just wow. Also, at about four o clock, when me and evan both were supposed to get off work, my manager must havecalled Mcdonalds and told them to keep him two hours late because I obviously didnt want to see him or anything. That's the only reasonable explaination for things to suck SO MUCH in one period of 24 hours. Thanks to a lack of time for anything, especially excerrise I'm getting fatter. Yeah, excited. In conclusion: multitasking: not my forte. READ 01 REPLY

Since September [Saturday October 22nd, 2005 at 2:08pm] [ music | sondre lerche - you know so well ] Sometimes the crackling conversation beneath my feet of leaves that prepubescent only last week and the scent of the cold like swallowing snow from years ago and pretending it’s as sweet, is an epiphany Sometimes that pensive pitch in your voice Spilling over chattering teeth Saying simply, “It’s not that cold.” And the cracks: silver splinters in the icy blue of your eyes Is enough to make me melt Sometimes our frozen fingers entangle Like the turkeys made of preschool palms We burn our young tongues on hot cocoa And words so loaded we go numb Sometimes the musty scent of the holidays The brotherly brushing of sweatered shoulders The eclipse of strangers praying lips On new years eve, makes me mourn The person I used to be. Sometimes the quiet hush of the naked pavement Widowed and exposed, except for the organs Clothed by broken bottles and condoms Makes me hug my hands to my ribs, shudder, And pray for spring. READ 01 REPLY

[Thursday October 20th, 2005 at 8:32pm] [ music | of montreal - pancakes for one ] So, I've been hired for the holidays. I start monday, making $7.65. Hours are lame, 3-7 pretty much all the time which kills my weekends. So, as usual my friday has been ruined my Joe Mac, wow, excited. Kind of a drag considering I would really like to see Elizabethtown. Anyone intrigued? Saturday, it's going to be pretty rowdy at the Wilson fam halloween party. I'm lousy with crowds though. Hopefully it'll still be a good time. I'm pretty much finished with jodi picoult, all her novels pretty much follow the same pattern: maternal figure that loves too much, friend that wants to be more than, and semen samples. Maybe in a couple years I'll go back to her. I finished franny and zooey for the second time, nd I'm still dissatisfied with myself. I need to pick something up afterschool tomorrow whilst anticipating a lonely uneventful evening. It's been popcorn for dinner the last two nights. I havent been to the gym since two mondays ago. The main thing is, I really miss my boyfriend. Saturday is 2 1/2. READ 00 REPLY

[Wednesday October 19th, 2005 at 11:04pm] [ music | ben kweller - harriet's got a song ] It's true, I'm a mess without livejournal. In other news, tomorrow I have my first job interview ever at Michaels. I'm excited. Cross 'em for me. READ 04 REPLY

poem [Wednesday October 5th, 2005 at 9:48pm] how do you send your love letters, your soft fragile graphite hearts, when your mailman is raw with heart ache; red-faced, charcoal-tongued, granite-handed, stormy-eyed and collapsed at the feet of his linen-laced bride, asleep in a sea of glass, the sheets stained burgundy, and her broken mouth, cries out a desperate symphony The envelop fades at the seams in it's little metal coffin, it's red flag weary in waiting and anxious for attention. & you should be pleased to know it’s not why he never phoned He fancied fashioning himself in female accessories & now you’re just another embarrassing t-shirt Flaunting the name of a place you’ve never been Lying among leftovers and letdowns More outdated than outgrown, like home you’ve always known In case you missed it, your wife’s dead in her own vomit Died coughing up wedding vows reeking of regret & the naïve little doe, waiting by the phone, She’s the one you brought home that night before Her earrings on the TV stand, almost as incriminating as a diaphragm &I suppose it only goes to show, that every loving hold Goes to and fro, for every kiss there is a hit For every lover, there is a martyr An obvious work in progess. Comments? READ 03 REPLY

[Thursday September 22nd, 2005 at 9:29pm] [ mood | exhausted ] [ music | belle and sebastian - if she wants me ] SARA A LA BABE! K-NOT, but atleast i'm not punkrawkcore anymore and in my book thats a big thumbs up. ANYWAYSSS, LIFE IS WEARING ME THIN. I dont believe i've ever been so tired. so today i got beat up by teflon pans. (i'm dead serious i have three bandaids to prove it) & I'm going to montreal nov 11-13! & since when am i the college essay slave paid in burritos and kisses? today, i guess. i just dont want to be blamed if babycakes doesnt get into AI. kbye. READ 03 REPLY

[Friday September 16th, 2005 at 3:18pm] [ music | Belle & sebastian - if you find yourself caught in love ] MY LIFE IS DOOMED TO BE RUINED BY JOE. lame lame lame. somebody come out with me. IM stopeatingcars. CALL ME? IEEEEEE PRZPRZPRZ!? READ 07 REPLY

[Thursday September 15th, 2005 at 12:03pm] [ music | belle & sebastian - step into my ofice baby ] When I feel like shit, I look like this So, thanks to the lack of vanilla soy milk i was forced to use 2% and thus my body betrayed me. halfway en route to school and i start getting stomache spasms. by the morning announcements i felt like i was on fire & and i had goosebumps. So I ran home. & got all the sick out of me. That's my cute little anti-dairy story. since then i've been partying it up. okay i'm lying. i've been sleeping with about 8 pillows 2 blankets and the air condition on full blast. So today I have to help Evan with his college essay for AI for obvious reasons, i'm brilliant. & then I need to bake for the keyclub busting out peanut butter chocolate chip cookies & pretty polka dot pastel cuppy cakes? eff ya. that's just how i roll. in other news my ears are naturally a 12 gage? i spent $12 on what i assumed to be yellow curry last night BUT it had mushrooms?! which is odd because there is not one recipe for yellow curry that includes mushrooms. i dont know maybe not hire blind chefs? thanks thai village thanks. anyways, this blows. i'm going back to sleep. p.s. Belle and Sebastian's Dear Catastrophe Waitress album is gold. READ 06 REPLY

[Saturday September 10th, 2005 at 1:14pm] [ mood | cheerful ] [ music | the new amsterdams - the idaho ] So, last night Evan had his first ( show. ) & it was a fest to remember. READ 03 REPLY

[Tuesday September 6th, 2005 at 4:38pm] [ mood | aggravated ] [ music | the new amsterdams - every double life ] So basically American history brings me to tears. OKAY, it doesn't. But i hate it all the same. I watched speak last night and laughed pretty much the whole way through. way to go lifetime with uh..RUINING EVERYTHING. & who gets raped in the passenger seat with the fucking door open? WEIRDOS! I apologise if the above statement applies to you Tonight i'm seeing dad for the first time since maine. dang, daddio is down on his game. hopefully this means barns and noble is in the cards. so, some one put my bras in the dryer, & they fought and i tried and tried but i cant untagle them. so i'm pretty bummed. & I redid my myspace READ 05 REPLY

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